A month ago, I walked into 2018 with an idea, a plan, and a set of goals I was going to accomplish this month. I was PRE-PARED MAN! You couldn’t tell me nothin’. Week 1 I was gonna do this. Then Week 2 I was gonna do that. Week 3 I would have time to do those things, and Week 4 was all about getting ready for the NEXT month. Today is January 23rd. There are 8 days left to this month. I’ve “accomplished” maybe a quarter of what I intended to. Today I looked back at one-month-ago me and thought “DAMN, she was a fool.” And then I smiled.

I smiled because of all the things I meant to accomplish in January I didn’t include all of the things my team and I are crushing I daily. I didn’t include all of the beautiful pictures I’ve been painted a part to make this amazing collection of life experiences for people. I didn’t think about the capacity of the love that would grow inside of me for people I didn’t know TWO months ago. I didn’t take into consideration that one simple conversation with someone could (and would) change their entire outlook on every day. I had all these strategic plans for growth plotted out on my map, that I didn’t realize that by the end of this one month course, there would be even MORE growth than I could have planned for. Even if it was a different kind. And that foolish girl I was 22 days ago was a gift the Universe gave me.

Many people connect a “fool” with someone ill equipped, uneducated, or even stupid. In tarot, the fool isn’t about a person at all, he is about the journey. In tarot, he is a positive card. A card of new beginnings.

In my favorite deck, The Wild Unknown Tarot, the fool is depicted by a baby bird stepping off a branch, wings seemingly too small to hold himself up once he falls. In the guidebook it says, “with a single step he leaves behind the comfort of the nest…” The picture painted by this beautiful illustration is one of innocence, fragile beauty with its sunrise golds and reds in the backdrop, and one of fierce determination as this baby bird takes his leap of faith. His fall is inevitable, there will probably be some pain, maybe an injury or two that will slow his journey. But he has already begun. What tarot has taught me about being a fool is that not knowing is OK. Having a plan go completely wrong, or at the very least not AS you planned, is OK. In fact, it’s better than ok. Being foolish enough to think you have it figured out, usually means you’ll wind up learning an even bigger life lesson the Universe has in store for you. Be foolish enough to come up with a goal, a plan, a path. And be foolish enough to get it wrong, do it differently, and to fall off the branch. Because being a fool simply means you’re on a journey.

And if being a fool means that I begin a new journey over and over again, learning every day that plans evolve, goals change, and growth is the product of taking chances, then please Universe let me be a fool for the rest of my life.